MyDemonMuse

"I wanna move you somewhere close to ecstasy, I might tell you things of which you wont believe.
I wanna view the signals that control your brain - I need a taste, I need your everything.
As you enter into my curse our dreams reverse, and the demons burn.
So I wait, anticipate to meet you tonight.
Just come this way and I will bring your dreams to life.
From the first time I saw you to now I have counted the years that gone by
we'll release those demons tonight... tonight"

So, I have moved back to Asheville.
Colorado just wasn't going to work out, I need to be here to take care of my dad and start cosmetology school in the Spring.
I live with my close friend Chelsea right now and it is going very well. We got an awesome deal on a badass house for cheap. We totally lucked out I love it.
I got a job serving and bartending at an italian restaurant which is paying the bills so I'm happy with that.
I'm newly single and diggin it.
My close friends just got engaged and asked me to do their engagement and bridal photos and I agreed. I'm a little intimidated but I know I can do it.
I'm happy to have a photography project again.
My roommate also has a friend that wants me to shoot his album cover and the theme sounds like a lot of fun.
I'm excited.
So hopefully yall will be seeing some photos from me soon!
I discovered a lot of old drawings so I think I may finish them, I posted one the other day but theres at least 5 or 6 so I'm goin for it.
Things are looking up, hopefully they stay that way.
Wish me luck!

-Eli-za-bitch

"A night train - midnight.
Bags gathered round my feet.
Possessions, some lessened,
to carry with me.
Heavy and soothing,
like a gentle symphony.
I rest my head right
back upon my seat.
It's hard and cold though,
the best thing for me.
This train is movin'
but my heart is stationary.
Seasons change, it wont ever be the same. I'm hopin' I will stay the same.
Reasons strange... Why we always play these games?"

Its funny how things change.
Everything in my life is starting to come to a head. I'll admit though, its been a long time coming and it is for the best to finally air all of the dirty laundry.
Doug and I have been odd.
Work has been REALLY odd.
Banner Elk... well don't even get me started on that.
Its hard to feel human in a small town like this where everyone's business becomes your own, I'm not made for it. I guess that makes me a bit of a city girl. Oh well.
I'm moving to Boulder Colorado hopefully by the end of August with some very close friends.
That is, if they don't flake... In which case, Ive saved enough to be able to go wherever the hell I want so somehow, some way, I'm moving away from here. Maybe being alone would be the best thing for me. Only time will tell.
My inspiration is running on low, so to regain it I have been revisiting halfway completed drawings from years ago. Its kinda been fun/therapeutic to go through the old stuff and just finish it.
Don't be surprised if my page is soon bombarded with some very old silly drawings.
Its good anyway because I need to update more I suppose.

Life and my attitude towards it has been so strange lately, but then again, what would life be if it wasn't a little hard now and then?
Wish me luck.

-Eli-za-bitch

"A night train - midnight.
Bags gathered round my feet.
Possessions, some lessened,
to carry with me.
Heavy and soothing,
like a gentle symphony.
I rest my head right
back upon my seat.
It's hard and cold though,
the best thing for me.
This train is movin'
but my heart is stationary.
Seasons change, it wont ever be the same. I'm hopin' I will stay the same.
Reasons strange... Why we always play these games?"

So I just moved to Banner Elk, right next to Boone, and thus far its been an... interesting transition. I'm living with my boyfriend Doug now which I think was a good choice. Its nice to do my own thing and to have Doug around more often (Plus we have a fucking fireplace which is awesomeeeeee! haha).
I already have a job at a swanky little Italian joint. I'm bartending 3 days a week and serving 2 which is pretty much the perfect schedule for me (tips and a paycheck). Its my first real bartending gig so I'm excited about that. Thus far though Ive had a week off because their so slow this month that they closed to do some renovating. Apparently though next month is total madness so that will be good; once it starts snowing and Sugar Mtn. opens up for skiing/snowboarding.
Thats another thing- I'm gunna have to learn how to snowboard this winter because I have no fucking clue how and thats pretty much all there is to do out here haha. It should be an interesting endeavor.
Ive already made friends with our neighbors which is fun. They are much different from my usual demographic of friends but I'm in no position to complain and they seem to be quite nice.
Ive also had plenty of time to draw. I haven't posted anything but Ive been working on a lot of stuff. Hopefully I'll get some good pictures soon.
Speaking of being creative, Halloween was the shit! I was Poison Ivy on Saturday (we went downtown because Moog-fest was going on) and I made Doug into Two-face which was a big scary but pretty badass. On actual Halloween I made my face look like a sugar skull.
Ive been spending a majority of my time this week cleaning but I kinda enjoy it. The place looks really good if I do say so myself. Its also pretty awesome to live with a cook, I get good meals every night and morning which Id be crazy to complain about. Its been slow getting used to everything but I think this is all for the best.
Oh, and Ive been listening to a lot of electro trip-hop stuff lately. Doug pretty much only listens to hip-hop/ soul and some electronic so I had to find some way to compromise so I didnt have to listen to shitty rappers all day. long story short, heres some good bands Ive been hooked on, if any of you feel so inclined.
Massive Attack, Sneaker Pimps, Loveage, Portishead, The Submarines, Bitter:Sweet, Waldeck, and of course the occasional Bassnectar.
Any suggestions would be much appreciated!

-Eli-za-bitch

"A night train - midnight.
Bags gathered round my feet.
Possessions, some lessened,
to carry with me.
Heavy and soothing,
like a gentle symphony.
I rest my head right
back upon my seat.
It's hard and cold though,
the best thing for me.
This train is movin'
but my heart is stationary.
Seasons change, it wont ever be the same. I'm hopin' I will stay the same.
Reasons strange... Why we always play these games?"

So Ive been doing some more drawing lately. Right now I'm working on about 4 pin up girls and a painting so that's cool. Its nice to have something to do every day while I'm waiting for something to happen.
Ive been feeling a bit estranged from the DA community here so Ive been uploading some of my old photos that Ive stumbled across recently while cleaning out my computer. I really enjoyed finding them and I hope you do as well.
I started a new job, I work at Jack of Hearts in Asheville as a server. Its like an Irish pub/restaurant and its by far the most popular place in town so that's been working to my advantage tips wise, though I'm pretty beat every night when I come home.
I live with my dad and my grandmother as of current, which is alright because my dad cant get around very well any more and my grandma is 89 which I think is pretty self explanatory so needless to say they kinda require my help a lot of the time. They are pretty strong personalities though and its difficult to be around them for extended periods of time. Right now I don't even have my own bed let alone a room so its nice when I get a rare chance to be alone and go outside on the porch and doodle for a while.
I pretty much live with my boyfriend Doug right now, which I don't mind but I think I  might be driving him crazy. Hes stressed out about every part of his life right now and unfortunately he tends to take that out on me and our relationship. I try to remain understanding though because I really cant blame him, he has about 8 million things going on and we really don't even get a chance to see each other anymore. I cant remember the last time we got to actually go out and do something and not just hang out for 2 hours and crash every night. Oh well. Things can only go up, and despite the craziness we do love each other very much so I'm not worried, really.
His oldest friend Austin and I are trying to get a place together right now so we can have our own space again. I'm quite excited and we get along really well so I anticipate it being a good life choice.
I'm trying to save up to go to cosmetology school right now. I think its something I could be really good at, its just awfully expensive. Once I pay my dad back though then I think that he will help.
Wish me luck!

-Eli-za-bitch

I'm thinking that it's time to get out. My patients are fading fast, the mind bruises just a little bit easier, dark times and shadows cast.
What are you suffering for? Your pride or some kind of personal war? And when you throw it away for nothing more than a simple taste.
I'll stay in time and watch you pass by. I'll draw this line and hope you'll take my side. You shouldn't have to fight alone. Its nobody's battle but your own...

I hate watching my good friends be fake to even faker friends.
This is so dumb; all this silly backstabbing bullshit. I never thought a group of guys would cause more high school girl drama than my actual girl friends.
Regardless, I think I've figured out who my true friends are and thats all I can do I suppose.
On the bright side Doug and I are fantastic. Hes wonderful, he treats me like a GIRL - like a real girl. Plus, he can take care of his own car and he has not one, but two jobs, and he bought me flowers the other day just cuz and ohhhh... sigh. Its been years since Ive been this happy and I really desperately hope that it works. I'm quite trilled
I saw Bassnectar the other night and HOLYFUCKINGSHIT. It was EPICCC. Most fun Ive had in a while. I had my two girls Chelsea and Rebekah and we had a total fucking blast. Blew my mind. Oh my god.
Tonight is going to be fun because I'll have Doug and my best friend Dustin with Matt and Chad in a bar with some girly drinks and badass local beer on tap. I love living in the beer capitol of the USA haha.
I vow to have a great day because its beautiful on this side of the world today and everything is right!
... I'd still like a vacation soon though, any suggestions?

-Eli-za-bitch